


Let it out, Talk to me

by positivelypitch



Series: The 5 Stages of SMP Grief [2]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Dream Smp, Friends Supporting Friends, Mourning, Survivor Guilt, spoilers for tommy's march 1st stream
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-03
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-16 08:01:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29821872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/positivelypitch/pseuds/positivelypitch
Summary: Captain Puffy and Awesamdude teaching each other not to blame themselves for Tommy's Death. I think they both just need a hug...“I killed him…”“Dream?”“Tommy.”“Dream killed Tommy.”“Yeah but I didn’t stop him.”“You tried, Sam”“I didn't try hard enough.”Part 2 of The Five Stages of SMP Grief - Depression and Bargaining
Relationships: Cara | CaptainPuffy & Sam | Awesamdude, No Romantic Relationship(s)
Series: The 5 Stages of SMP Grief [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2192514
Kudos: 10





	Let it out, Talk to me

**Author's Note:**

> This is fiction. You are Real. There's been a lot of angst on the SMP recently, so I hope everyone is genuinely ok. My comments are always open if you need to say something or talk but down have a place to :)
> 
> That being said, please enjoy!

**Stage: Bargaining - Puffy and Depression -Sam**

“Sam, hey Sam, look at me.”

  
  


He’s sitting at the desk.

He hasn’t got up in a while.

  
  


“Can I at least get you something?” 

  
  


His head is in his hands, and he’s shaking like he’s trying not to. I can feel pain radiating from him in waves, not that I’m not already hurting. I’m trying to ignore the twinge of guilt that digs into me every time I move, but… Sam? I think he’s already been consumed by it. 

“When was the last time you ate?”

It’s been a one sided conversation the entire afternoon. Bowls of soup and mugs of coffee are piling up beside him, barely touched, only acknowledged with a quiet ‘Thank you’. I could force feed him I would, but I don’t think it would help the situation. 

“Sam you’re worrying me. Can you just take a bite? You need to eat.”

“Sorry…”

“It’s okay, hey, don’t be sorry.” 

He reaches blindly for a slice of toast, and takes a small bite. It’s like watching a tortoise eat lettuce, but at least it’s something.

“What's going through your head?” I ask. 

He speaks so softly that I have to lean in to hear him.

“I killed him…” 

“Dream?”

“Tommy.”

“Dream killed Tommy.”

“Yeah but I didn’t stop him.”

“You tried, Sam”

“I didn't try hard enough.”

I pull back and look at him. His eyes are shining with tears that he’s too scared to shed.

“Sam, what happened to Tommy was _not_ your fault.”

“Several people disagree. Including me.” 

“There was nothing you could have done.”

“I could have let him out. I could have gotten there faster. There is so much I could have done.”

“We both could have tried. And maybe we should have done more but it’s too- too late for Tommy. Dream said he wouldn’t kill him. Ages ago, he made that very clear, Sam.”

“I know he did. So I never expected it…” 

“Exactly.”

Sam takes a shaky breath, eating more of his toast.

“I only ever wanted what was best for Tommy…”

“I know that,” I say. “You know that.”

“I tried to save him Puffy. I heard him shouting at Dream to stop. And then when the lava came down Dream was standing there and Tommy was on the floor. I was just shouting, screaming at Dream as he laughed and Tommy wasn’t moving-”

I swallow back a sob. Tommy hadn't deserved any of it. He must have been so scared, not that he would ever show it. 

  
  


“Puffy?” 

My voice cracks when I reply. “Yeah?”

“If it’s not my fault it sure as hell isn’t yours.” 

He quirks a small, sad smile which I try to return. 

We’re holding each other up at this point. Only still going because the mystery of the explosion that led to Tommy's death isn’t solved.

This will get better, because it has to. It’s just hard to imagine at the moment.

  
  


We sit in silence for a while, sharing the weight of the burden.

“We’ll do better. We’ll protect the others.” I say minutes, hours later. Maybe to myself. Maybe to Sam. “We’ll honour Tommy, we’ll support Tubbo, we…”

He puts his hand on my arm.

“We’ll do what we can.” He says reassuringly.

“What we can… ...I miss him.” I say. 

“Me too.”

**Author's Note:**

> This is part 2 of my 5 Stages of Grief Series!
> 
> It will be going through different characters and how they process their grief for Tommy.
> 
> It wont be completely in order of the stages because it isn't about one character alone.
> 
> Next Story will be posted March 4th ; Technoblade - Acceptance


End file.
